Why surrogacy is important to us

Related to Intended Parents | Posted on May 19th, 2017
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My husband and I have been married for almost 10 years now. We put off having a family for all the usual reasons (wanting have stable jobs, wanting to be financially secure, wanting to have a good home ...) Finally when the time was right, we found that it wasn't as easy as we'd expected. I decided to have some medical tests run and the doctors found that I had been born with a condition that left me unable to have children. While it left me completely healthy, it was un-treatable and permanent. While the news was hard to swallow, it wasn't crushing to us. Having a biological child wasn't nearly as important as having a family was to us. The choice to adopt was easy and we knew immediately that it was what we wanted to do. Adoption rather fell into our laps unexpectedly. Although we knew it was what we wanted, it came to us, rather than us to it. My husband is a diplomat with the US State Department and at the time we were serving in southeast Asia. Just weeks after getting the news that I couldn't have children, a couple came to us and asked us if we could adopt their little girl. It seemed like fate. We needed a child, they needed a home for theirs. We immediately took her in and began raising her as our own. We fell completely, head over heels for her the instant we met her. She was the light of our lives, the heart of our family. And then it all went away. In the last stage of the adoption, at the final hearing, after raising her for months, we had expected to leave the courthouse with a birth certificate, instead we left with broken hearts. The parents had changed their minds and wanted her back. They had realized the finality of their decision and couldn't go through with it. While we were crushed, we couldn't hate her birth parents. We couldn't hate or blame anyone for loving her as much as we did. Still, it nearly destroyed us with grief. We cannot subject ourselves to the possibility of that kind of pain again with adoption. That is why we are looking now toward surrogacy. We have so much love to give. Love to a child, love to a child's surrogate mother ... We have spent a great deal of time preparing for a child to complete our family. I quit my job, becoming a stay-at-home contractor (I am a braille transcriber, I make books for people with visual impairments), so that I can be home 24 hours a day. We have bought a large house with a giant yard in a small town in Washington state near the park. While we are not "rich" people, we are comfortable and can provide so many opportunities to a child like attending private State Department schools, traveling the world, and experiencing new cultures. We believe in accepting all people, we believe in having fun, in being creative and original. We love having adventures and trying new things. Mostly we believe in family. It is that belief that keeps us going, that keeps us trying for a child to complete our little family. We hope to find the special someone who is willing to share that belief with us. Thank you.

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American Intended Parent, Forks, Washington, USA
Athena & Llywelyn - Intended Parent
Location: USA / Washington / Forks | Member since: May 19th, 2017 [EDT]
I was born with a congenital defect that prevents me from having a child. We attempted adoption, if we couldn't have our own, we wanted to give a child who needed a family all the love and happiness ... See Profile
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Zoey, Surrogate Mother
Commented on January 17th, 2018 12:40AM [EDT]
Possible Surrogate
Hello! I've gone through your profile and you sound like just the people I am looking for. I'm an independent surrogate living in Washington, who is looking to pursue surrogacy to pay for some or all of my nursing school. I'm also an avid lover of Harry Potter and DnD, so we have some easy ways to bond in common! Feel free to check out my profile and message me there, or at 360 857 8077 if on-site messaging won't work.
Kare (Amanda), Surrogate Mother
Commented on December 30th, 2017 02:53PM [EDT]
We miss Washington a lot! My husband and I both grew up in Everett WA, just north of Seattle :). I have more than a few memories out by Leavenworth, Spokane, & Wenatchee/Fish Lake and I desperately miss the smell of pine tree's sometimes. My parents still live there, and I enjoy visiting. Never been to Forks though, Only skimmed by Olympia and Southward towards Cali. How is it after Twilight hit the stores? :3, Does it have a big tourist following? We're currently in Oahu! Lots of beautiful beaches. I'm not a huge fan of sand, but I do love the water! I absolutely LOVE scuba! Unfortunately, I have to take a hit away from it while I surrogate (Nitrogen bubbles aren't good for baby, poo!). I figure, this gives me time to save up for my own gear, and get officially certified instead of signing up for group dives all the time. I've been lazy about it. I looked through your profile, took a peek at your business, and saw we had a couple things in common! My husband and I also play board games: DnD, Twilight Imperium, Betrayal at House on a Hill, etc. We're also pretty big gamers though, playing: World of Warcraft, Skyrim, Dragon Age, Witcher, etc. I also like Minecraft, Sims, and of course playing on our Switch! <3 Zelda is amazing as always! Can't say I can read a white of Braille, but I think it's awesome you have a job you love that helps so many people, A lot of people are giving you their condolences on your heartbreak over that little girl. I won't do that. You've heard it a million times before already. But I want to commend you on your strength when you said: "While we were crushed, we couldn't hate her birth parents. We couldn't hate or blame anyone for loving her as much as we did." <3 That's love right there. You're adopted daughter might not know it, but she was given a huge gift. Your unconditional love, and her birth parents back, Also, I apologize if this is a double post! I checked, and it doesn't say I sent you anything yesterday :o, I figured I'd try again. Just in case. Also, I did see that you were taking a break from searching for family reasons. So no pressure to reply if you're still in the throes of it :o. Would love to chat more! I've met some amazing people on various sites, and while I haven't met a match yet, I'm enjoying the social aspect of it.
Kare (Amanda), Surrogate Mother
Commented on December 30th, 2017 06:48AM [EDT]
This isn't an Automated message from an Agency this time =P
My home state is Washington. Just above Seattle, in Everett, is where I grew up. I spent more than a few trips out by Leavenworth, Lake Wenatchee/Fish Lake, and Spokane. Now we're in Honolulu Hawaii, and while I'm more of a cold weather person I can't say I don't love the beautiful water! Missing the snow though! I see that you are in Forks. Can't say I've ever been. Closest I've gotten is Olympia :). How is it after Twilight came out? :o, I'm curious! Do they have a fan base over there? I'm curious :3. Since I'm a huge fan of Scuba myself; I'm taking a hit and staying away for the surrogacy (Nitrogen bubbles! Poo!), Although, there is nothing wrong with just floating the stress away in the water! I am not quite as adventurous as you. I prefer to watch others do the cool stuff, but I'm happy to watch the videos and hear the stories! If I go on an adventure, it's going to be with Link in Zelda! I love video games. When I'm not playing games I'm buried in a book, and when I'm not buried in books, I'm doodling away. My husband and I are pretty geeky. We play DnD, video games, and read a lot. I'd like to know more about you guys. I've met some pretty amazing people already off different sites, and while I haven't quite snagged a match its been pretty fun,
Ryza, Surrogate Mother
Commented on May 20th, 2017 12:17PM [EDT]
Nice story, i hope you can find the right surrogacy mother... Godbless...