I AM LOOKING FOR

An open letter for ips from surrogate mother

Related to Surrogacy Agency | Posted on August 3rd, 2019
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Hello IPs! We haven’t met, but we’re looking for each other already. We’re about to embark on a great adventure that will knit our lives together intimately, at least for a time, and we don’t even know each other’s names! To me, you are Intended Parents, or IPs. To you, I am a Gestational Surrogate, Gestational Carrier or simply the Surrogate. What a strange way to begin such a relationship! Though I don’t yet know you, I am pretty sure that having to have me around wasn’t an original part of your family plans. I imagine your hopes and dreams have had to change and evolve much to lead you to this point. For that, I want you to know, that I think you’re incredibly courageous people and I admire your strength and resolve. I also want you to know that I understand what incredible trust you are placing in me and I do not take at lightly. Please be assured that I did not undertake this idea on a whim. It has come with the passage of time, the gathering of information, much discussion and even more prayer. While there has been a lot of focus on me throughout the process (my health, my thoughts, my fears, my family’s role, etc) I want you to know that we have never once lost track of you. You are why I am here! Without you, I wouldn’t be going on this journey. Thank you for giving me this gift of an incredible opportunity. I know you’ll probably wonder and worry a lot about me. How can you know if I am eating right, sleeping enough, being active but not too active? How can you be sure I am taking my prenatal vitamins, that I’m avoiding too much coffee, or that I won’t be exposed to something I shouldn’t be? Can you be sure that on delivery day, we’ll all be on the same page medically? Can you rest assured that I will carry your child with as much care as my own? How will you know that I will be as communicative as you’d want? The answer to all those questions is you can’t know and you can’t be sure, you just have to trust me. I will do the same for you. I will trust that you’ll understand my needs and my judgment, just as I will do for you. At the end of this adventure, I hope we can look back on the time where you were just IPs and I was just the surrogate and laugh because it seems so silly to have not always known and cared for one another. Here’s to our journey! Lets go on an adventure!

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