When I was 7 years old, I saw my baby sister being born because the ambulance did not come in time to take my mother to the hospital. Ever since then, I have been terrified of giving birth. I have been married for 15 years and at first I thought we would be ok with not having children. But time has passed and we recently bought our own house, we have a dog who we love as we would love a child but I just know that both my husband and I feel like there is something missing from our lives. As we grow older and more settled, the urge to have children has grown. I feel terrible about my fear. I have other serious health issues that would make the pregnancy dangerous for me, and that makes me even more afraid. But I do not want to be dishonest with myself, with a surrogate or with my future child. I probably could become pregnant without endangering my life. My fear is preventing it as much as my health. If we can find someone who can be understanding of that, that is the surrogate for us. I am looking for someone who can get along with us and our family. I do not want a stranger and I do not want to hide from our future child the gift of life that a surrogate would give to them. I would love to find someone who wants to remain a part of our lives.