Kristin & Matt, American Intended Parent in Leawood, Kansas, USA

Explain your reasons for wanting a surrogate/donor:

My wife and I have been happily married for almost 4 years. Two years into our marriage it was revealed my wife had a serious deformation in her uterus (hundreds of fibroids, some the size of a baseball). To control the intense pain and dangerous menstrual bleeding, surgery was performed to remove as many fibroids as possible and yet maintain a health, child bearing reproductive system. After another year of trying, and even IVF, it was determined she would never be able to carry a healthy child. After a year of 2nd, 3rd and 4th opinions, all over the country, we had given up all hope on a family of our own biological makeup. Along came an angel in the form of my wife's sister-in-law (we'll call her SIL, her brother's wife). She has a beautiful family of her own, with three very healthy children and easy pregnancies. She and her husband (my brother in law, my wife's sibling) approcached us and wanted to see us experience the love and amazement that is bringing a child into the world. We were overjoyed and amazed at their generosity. We immediately began the process again with our fertility doctor to prepare her SIL for the embryo transfer, since we had already done an IVF cycle and had embryos frozen and ready. It took one cycle and we were expecting!!! This was the most amazing news we had received and knew we had a higher being looking over us and allowing this to happen. At the 3rd checkup post implantation, the doctor revealed some news to us....we were having TWINS!!!! This was met with schock, tears, happiness and amazement. While we intend on having a family of several children, we were never planning on or trying to have twins. It was truly a blessing. Several months went by and everything was progressing nicely, and we were preparing for our new, exciting life with to baby girls. At a checkup in the summer (12-14 weeks) the doctor had noticed some of the growth trends of the girls were abnormal, and we needed to keep an eye on it for developmental disorders. Fear set in, panic arose, and we immediately began to pray for "our girls". This was the hardest 2 weeks in which we awaited the results from the genetic testing. All we thought about, dreamt about, talked about were the girls and the possibility of them being sick. When we received the call from the genetic counselor, saying the tests were all negative, tears of joy were shed, prayers were answered and life veered back to normal. We had been through so much from the day we were married and attempted to start a family - we knew this was a hiccup on the road to our blessed family to be. We started to discuss names (both girls named after their birth mother), nursery ideas, etc. and everything was good. I still remember the day I received a call from my wife while she was at a checkup with her SIL. I usually was at all of them, but this day was different - due to work circumstances. I found it odd to be receiving a call shortly after the appointment time, so I cautiously answered. It was my wife, crying, trembling, and barely able to speak. We had lost the girls. I don't remeber exactly what happened, or said next, but I was at the doctor immediately. It was heartbreaking. I entered the private room where my wife, the SIL and a few of her kids were. My wife was in shock and flowing tears, SIL was crying as well and I was balling. Why did this happen? How did this happen? What is next? It turns out our girls were much, much more sick than any generic test was able to pick up on. They had made it about 16 weeks, and for those 16 weeks, they were the light of our eyes and what made life worth living for. Fast forward to today. We still think about what could have been, and pray that the girls felt the love we had for them from day one. We haven't attempted surrogacy or any other forms of growing our family. It's almost as if we're still in shock. The angel that came to us in the form of the SIL has since moved out of town with her family (it was always a one time thing - and we are forever blessed for the chance), and friends all around us contine to ask why and what is next. That brings us here...