Karen, American Surrogate Mother in Colorado Springs, Colorado, USA

Why I want to be a surrogate mother:

Once I started looking into surrogacy, it really struck me as the perfect job for me. I have always loved being pregnant, and have given birth with no pain drugs 3 out of 4 times (the first time I did end up with pain meds and then an epidural after over 24 hours of un-medicated labor) I do not intend to ever have an epidural again. I have had four unplanned pregnancies with one man (who was my husband for all the births) but though I didn't intentionally plan them, I immensely enjoyed each of them. (I don't enjoy Everything that comes With pregnancy -but I Do enjoy being pregnant...). I love my children powerfully and would love the opportunity to give someone else a chance to be the loving, whole family unit that I had wanted for my children. I always felt guilty knowing there are thousands of wonderful couples out there who try and try and are unable to conceive on their own. When I got married, my wedding coordinator was in the process of undergoing In-vitro for the first of their 3 invitro babies -at age 50. I hope to give a younger couple the opportunity to be parents so their kids can grow up with a mom and dad who are physically healthy and able to be around for them and actively play with them and whatnot for a good long time. I would like to initiate my first Very Intentional, Planned pregnancy, and share this priceless gift with a special couple.

Description of myself:

First off I'd like to make it clear that I live in Colorado Springs, CO, USA and am not in a position at this time to move or travel outside of the Springs farther than 30-45 minutes.(So nothing up in Denver or in other states, countries, etc.) PLEASE DO NOT CONTACT ME IF you live farther than 30 minutes from Colorado Springs, CO, USA and are not able/willing to travel to where I am. I would like to be very close with the parents and have them be very involved in the pregnancy etc.This would be easier if they live in Colorado Springs or nearby. I'm a mom of four beautiful boys.I currently do not have them in my home the majority of the time but am working towards sole custody.I was a full-time stay at home mother for 6 years until a horrible divorce ripped our lives apart.I would like to help a gentle, loving couple give a precious little one of their own the whole, loving, healthy family that I wanted to give my own children. A bit about me personally: I love nature and animals.In my home currently, we have 5 African Clawed Frogs (fully aquatic frogs) fresh water live bearing fish, and my children have a cat and a couple of male beta fish.I love art.Everything from drawing, painting, pottery, sculpting, music, martial arts, dance, etc.Music and photography are special passions of mine.I love to sing and play a little piano by ear, and have loved taking pictures with digital cameras since I was a teen.I also love plants and growing things, and have many houseplants and have recently completed designing and building a greenhouse to grow fresh, organic fruits and vegetables.I have seriously considered becoming a Birth or Postpartum Doula, Midwife's Assistant, or possibly a Childbirth Educator, but hope to go back to school eventually for a degree in Psychology. Because I consider this such a serious service, I would want any child I carry to be raised in a similar way to how I would raise my own little ones.I would prefer to help someone who will be gentle parents like me.I will describe my parenting style, and then list the things I consider non-negotiable as far as the way I would like a child I give life to -to be raised. I am a 'crunchy mama'.I'll get to that in a moment, but as far as my personal lifestyle: I am very health oriented.I love the outdoors and spend as much time outdoors during warm weather as I am able to.I am a lacto-ovo vegetarian (I do not eat dead animals but do sometimes consume animal products such as honey, milk, and eggs, though typically not as nutritional staples, but because I enjoy eating them).If you are not familiar with vegetarianism and are concerned about me and your child obtaining adequate nutrients, I will be happy to explain to you in detail where I get my nutrients, as well as remind you that I have carried 4 healthy boys to full term and the smallest was 7lbs 6oz.I do not drink any alcohol.I can count on two hands the amount of times I have consumed an alcoholic beverage in my life -and none of those times were while I was pregnant.I have never been 'drunk'.I do not do caffeine such as coffee or tea i.e.green, black, etc.I Do consume herbal teas for nutritional and medicinal purposes, most of which are home-blended after careful research and consideration.-the most caffeine I consume is probably from chocolate.I have never smoked anything.I don't even use candles or incense in my home.I avoid artificial sweeteners, preservatives, white flour, white rice, white pasta, white sugar, and do not habitually keep these in my home other than in small amounts for baking a special treat on occasion.I avoid chemicals -in body-care products as well as household cleaning products.I make many of my own body care products including my own deodorant (I refuse to use aluminum containing deodorants).I am a Christian, and my relationship with my God is very important to me.I would prefer to work with fellow Christian parents, I'm not terribly picky about denomination, as long as they believe in the Bible, and Jesus, and have a deep respect and tolerance for others who believe differently than they do.Now, for my parenting style: I do not use Cry it out or any other 'sleep training' methods.I do not spank.I do not believe in certain types of 'time-out' (long story -happy to explain).I prefer 'gentle discipline' techniques rather than authoritarian or permissive parenting approaches.I believe in co-sleeping, or the 'family bed'.I would Strongly recommend you consider bed sharing with your brand new baby, as this helps greatly with breastfeeding And bonding, two areas where a mom who hasn't given birth to her baby will need plenty of extra help in.I cloth diaper, exclusively breastfeed for the first year "Solid food before one, is Just for fun" is a guide I go by and agree with.I Never introduce solid foods or anything but breast milk before 6 months, and try to hold off until after 9months unless they're like grabbing it out of your hands! I nurse to term -that is whenever my child is ready to stop and doesn't feel they need it any more.I have tandem nursed two at a time, and the longest I have nursed is until they were 4.5 years old.I use '3-day Potty Training'.I am a strong believer in this method -it is gentle, non-shaming, and teaches the child to recognize their own bodily signals.It is recommended to be used as early as 22 months (though I am not rigid about that provided that the child is Obviously ready to learn) -and it Does work that early -I know -because my 4 year old was trained in this way at that age.I do not believe in 'early education' and believe that play is the best education a child needs until they are legally required to be enrolled in a formal school.I am a big fan of home-schooling.I am a hands on, get off your butt type of parent.Rather than yelling at the kids and telling them to go do something, I get up and go help them do it from a very young age.I try to be gentle and explain things thoroughly so they understand Why they need to do/not do something, or behave/not behave in a certain way.I try to parent by example and logic, rather than "Do as I say because I said so..." A good example of this would be what I've been doing a lot with my two year old lately: If he has something he shouldn't or took from one of his brothers -rather than forcefully taking it from him, I work with him and tell him nicely to please give it to me or his brother etc.until he does.He usually complies with this fairly quickly with a big smile, and if not -a little patience goes a long way in teaching a lesson in how to be gentle and polite to others.Rather than taking it from him forcefully -causing a crying fit -as he feels it's unfair that it was taken from him -I get him to give it to me of his own free will and then praise him for his obedience and doing the right thing.If a child hears their parent crossly telling them to get out of the way or do chores, etc -that's how they're going to treat other children and their parents.Children will model the respect they are given by others .I use a lot of natural remedies with my kids for everything from bee stings to cuts and scrapes and bruises, eye infections to ear infections (unless it's the inner ear).I do Not go to a doctor very often at all.Actually, breastmilk fixes almost everything! I put it on cuts and scrapes, use it in the eyes for eye infections (yes, breastmilk is the well-known best remedy for eye infections even as bad as pink eye itself!) etc.I enjoy essential oils, herbs, and other simple natural home remedies.I personally chose not to vaccinate my children until after age 2 (or at all).I would appreciate that any potential parents be respectful of this and at least look into reasons not to vaccinate.I have made this decision after Many hours of research, including watching Hours of documentaries and lectures, and informing myself about Every Ingredient contained in the current recommended vaccines.I personally know Several families (including my own) who have had infants die or become severely injured from vaccines, and would hate for something terrible like this to happen to a child I went to all the trouble to grow and birth for you. As far as pregnancy and childbirth, here is how I do it: I drink herbal tea throughout the pregnancy to nourish myself and the baby and tone my body and uterine muscles in preparation for the birth.During the last few of weeks of pregnancy, I take Evening Primrose Oil to help to ripen my cervix and facilitate a quicker, smoother birth.I avoid ultrasound unless for a medical reason (like a car accident)."Seeing how big the baby is" is NOT a medically necessary reason for an ultrasound.I trust in my body's proven ability to nurture a child, and prefer not to interfere unnecessarily.After a confirmed pregnancy test, Unless we think the baby has died -there is no reason we Need an ultrasound.A Good practitioner can gauge the health of a fetus without this unnecessary and potentially harmful intervention.I do not accept ANY drug interventions whatsoever during the birth process.I Do not accept vaginal exams prior to labor, and then during labor I do not accept routine vaginal exams, and will not consent to any unless I personally ask for one (in the past this occurred during transition out of curiosity -unnecessary vaginal exams can expose me and the baby to infection, delay the progression of labor, and worst case scenario -stall labor, resulting in a snowball of complications up to and including the death of the baby).With my third birth, I had a total of 1 vaginal exam the entire pregnancy and birth! He is now Four years old.How far you are dilated does NOT tell you how soon or fast the baby will arrive! There are women who hang open at 3cm for Weeks before giving birth -and then there are those who stay closed until active labor begins.Directly after birth, I take an hebal tincture of Shepherds Purse to help avoid excessive hemorrhage.I do Not allow the umbilical cord to be cut until it has Stopped Pulsing and is White and Flaccid -thus ensuring that your baby receives ALL of his or her blood.(if clamped/cut before this, your baby could lose up to 1/3 of their blood! which affects their iron levels for the first months of life, etc.) I do not agree to any newborn vaccinations, no Eye-drops/goop.No Vitamin K (long story) No circumcision (the foreskin has a distinct purpose and it is Not gentle to cut off part of your child soon after their birth -I have two circumcised and two intact sons, have watched a circumcision, and will not agree to carrying a child only to have it cut up after I give birth to him.) I would like if the mother would go through the process of artificially stimulating her own milk production so she can nurse her baby.If she is unable to succeed with this, I would prefer the baby be fed with only human breast-milk from friends or a milk-bank.Breastmilk has over *** ingredients that CANNOT be replicated and put into formula, it is undisputedly the best nutrition for your baby during the first years of his or her life.Would you feed yourself on nothing but vitamin supplements for a year? I may be willing to wet-nurse and/or pump for a likely brief period of time after the birth depending on our relationship, your comfort level, and the general situation.Colostrum is essential for a new baby, and I would want to give him or her the best start they can possibly get -however I have never been a big producer, and if you are going to have your baby with you after the birth, I will not be able to produce enough for very long because milk supply is driven by supply and demand, so I would have to be with the baby nursing on demand 24/7 in order to be able to produce enough for them long term.I Cannot consistently pump enough as my body does not respond to that type of artificial stimulation.In special circumstance -if we were close, I may even be willing to go so far as to figure out some arrangement as to being able to exclusively nurse the baby for the first few weeks, but of course would need additional compensation for not working and would probably have to work something very unusual out, like one of us going to the other's home all day, every day for a few weeks, or having me live in your home with you during that time, in either case my own children would need regular access to me.I know this sounds quite extreme, but I really am very committed to giving your baby the absolute best start he or she can possibly have, and I am very passionate about the amazing powers of breastmilk. During the pregnancy and birth: If you would like, I'd be happy to take a weekly picture of the baby belly.I'd probably pick Saturday or Sunday of every week, and try to use the same pose, and background, so you can watch the progression.If you would like a birth photographer present to film the actual birth and your first moments with baby, I would definitely be open to looking into that.I will require an experienced Birth Doula for the birth process.I find this essential for a positive outcome, especially considering this would be your baby and I would not have a significant other there for support.Please do some research so you understand what a Birth Doula is, DONA.org has great information about doulas, but it's not the only reputable organization to hire from.I would like to spend a lot of time with Mommy and Daddy during the pregnancy.Visit weekly or twice a week, maybe more if we really hit it off well and we both have the time.I would like you both to talk to the baby, and even record you singing and reading to the baby, so I can play it over headphones to the baby often.It's important for him or her to become familiar with your voice.I have some favorite songs I could show/teach you if you'd like.:) I would like you to have immediate skin to skin with baby after birth, and depending on if you are lactating or not -obviously nurse for the first time ASAP.I would be happy to help to the best of my ability -mom to mom- with nursing in the beginning.Otherwise, if you would like me to wet-nurse in the beginning, of course you could be right there while we're working on that.

My letter to intended parents:

Dear Mommy and Daddy to be, I will write more later, but I truly believe that if I am to be a surrogate mother for someone, it will be a match made in Heaven, because I believe that the only way I could find a compatible couple that I could really click with and feel comfortable doing this for, is if God meant it to happen. My pictures are: Profile Picture: My boys and me, taken in February, *** #3 and me -around 3 months old #4 and me just after birth Labor with #3 -at home #s 1 & 2 #1 and me just after birth 1 week before giving birth to #4 (2 pictures) and #4 and me recently. I will need to be covered under health insurance.If you would be willing to cover me for about a year, including the weeks leading up to the pregnancy and the 6 week postpartum period, that would be excellent.I am currently on Medicaid, and cannot afford other insurance.Most organizations will not work with a potential surrogate who is on any type of government aid, but I have run into some that will work around that if you are willing to get off the assistance during the process.I am open to this -as long as I will be adequately provided for. Specifically I would ask for something like the following during the pregnancy and birth process: Full Health Insurance, and covering all regular stuff including pregnancy and birth related medical and other expenses.Regular weekly chiropractic/massage therapy care (has been linked to shorter, easier labors, reducing the 'need' for pain medications, as well as is good for the baby as it helps with circulation, which is essential for a healthy baby) an Experienced Birth Doula for the labor and birth Payment for a 6 week minimum postpartum maternity leave from work, in order to recuperate physically and mentally from the birth and the traumatic process of having the baby taken from me after.I am guessing that my body will essentially feel like I had a still-born, and I am guessing this would logically predispose me to Postpartum Depression.Like I said in the beginning, I'll write this out better later, but I wanted to get something up because people keep contacting me who aren't anywhere near me.In short -it's Really nice to meet you -and I pray you find the person you are looking for to share in this amazing journey and new chapter in your life.